Fighting Evil

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Some people are into “moral relativism.” These people say that there is no such thing as absolute evil, and that all notions of good and evil are dependent upon social or cultural factors.

We here at Bonius.com believe that moral relativism is a big, horking load of bullshit. There is indeed such a thing as an absolute EVIL.

There are, at this very moment, EVIL men with bulldozers ripping up some of the most productive farmland in the world, and replacing it with strip malls, plastic houses, and parking lots.

Well Fuck that.

To arms, good people! To arms!

The noble warriors at The Lancaster Farmland Trust are putting on a bicycle charity ride to raise monies to help preserve what’s left of Lancaster County from the forces of EVIL.

Mark your calendars, the ride is June 2nd. It’s $25 to enter, and you can ride 6, 20, or 51 mile routes depending on your fitness level.

There is more information available at the event website:
http://www.lancasterfarmlandtrust.org/pedal.html

All the great heroes of history fought EVIL in tight-fitting clothing. Superman, Spider-man, even Wonder Woman all donned spandex to dispatch the forces of darkness. Why should you be any different?

Dig it. A Super-hero bike jersey. It has a spiffy-looking farming scene on it and is available in lots of sizes – including a 3XL “club fit”, which should even work for beer-bellied super-men like me!

Bike Jersey

So, you can go for a nice ride in the countryside, dress up like a hero, and help defeat the dark minions of bulldozer-wielding madmen!

Jihad!

4 thoughts on “Fighting Evil

  1. I bet 10 or so more minutes on the design, and the guy who put that jersey together could have made it just a touch more ugly. My eyes are on fire from the ugly.

    Great cause though… I’ll buy one,

    and then put the jersey out of its misery by killing it.

    *See ya soon for The Epic Ride*

    -Me

  2. “Amish quilt patterns roxer maximum bee’s knees”
    [got that line directly from Grant P. one night when we were doing some blow together at a tittie bar].

    -Me

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